Transitions Are Like Vitamins

Transitions are tough.

They are like a One-A-Day vitamin.

You gag trying to swallow it.

Its bigger than a peppermint.

Can’t they come in smaller sizes?

Gulping down water,

the vitamin scrapes against your throat

and rests somewhere

between your mouth

and stomach.

More water is needed.

Gulp, gulp, gulp.

…15 minutes later

….nausea is your name.

Who tries taking a vitamin on an empty stomach?

You did.

Tomorrow comes,

its time to take your vitamin.

The memory of yesterday

is not forgotten today.

This time you have a plan.

You take a knife and slice

the vitamin in ha          lf.

With ease and confidence,

you swallow those halves.

Gulp, gulp, gulp.

…15 minutes later

….nausea is your name.

Who tries taking a vitamin on an empty stomach?

You did,

again.

Tomorrow comes,

its time to take your vitamin.

The memory of yesterday

is not forgotten today.

This time you have a plan.

You swallow your halved vitamin,

Gulp, gulp, gulp.

And eat a piece of toast and jelly.

Coming Soon...

I’m a sucker for Coming Soon signs. In the mall, on the road, postings in the newspapers–check, check, check! I will go out of my way to read these signs. Watch out because that may mean running a curb! The busybody in me likes to know these things so that I can report them to my husband, dog, mom, and anyone else who has ears to hear.

Something I’ve noticed and come to envy are the owners of these Coming Soon properties because they are able to hide whatever it is that is coming soon. They get to board up their mess and leave only a pretty sign for the world to view. While I would love to gawk at their construction and disarray, I must resign to reading the Coming Soon sign a few times and then getting on with my day.

I wish I could enclose myself in a private space, display a Coming Soon sign and wait for the Lord’s return. “Coming soon a fully redeemed perfected Emily.” If there is good reason for property owners to cover up their mess, isn’t there good reason to hide mine? It would be great to hide my weakened body, rarely do I feel like I’m in picture perfect physical and emotional condition.

But I believe that God would want something else, something completely opposite. Which is exactly why I’m writing this post. Here is a verse that helped me form this belief:

“But we have this treasure in jars of clay to show that this all-surpassing power is from God and not from us.” (2 Corinthians 4:7)

Over the past several weeks I’ve thought a lot about this verse, which is why I believe that God’s plan is not for me to be hid but for me to be on display so that his light can shine forth, casting truth and grace into the dark world. I draw hope in this: Believers are the jars of clay and the power of God, manifested in Christ, is the treasure.

We, the vessel are worthless without the treasure that was trustingly sent to us. Therefore, proclaiming the incredible transforming power of the gospel is our most worthy pursuit. As long as the gospel is being displayed through us, the vessel, everything is going accordingly (at least that is what I’ve come to expectantly hope in).

But that is easier said than done! We want bodies that can do more than just proclaim the gospel. Who has heard someone say, “My body gets me from point A to point B, what more could I ask for?” No way! We only say that about the jalopy we drove until we had enough money to buy a new car. We want a body that attracts a spouse, performs well enough to keep a steady job, allows for life-goals to be accomplished, and survives long enough to see grand children. Hear me out, I’m not discounting 1 Corinthians 6:19-20, I’m just looking at things from another angle.

It was good for me to be reminded that the treasure is the gospel and not my body, which in this verse is referred to as the jar of clay. My body has failed me many times; often it moves in ways that are beyond my control. I rejoice in knowing that the real thing to treasure is the indwelling Holy Spirit. This treasure is indestructible and is what I should focus on others noticing Many times I am ashamed by the way my body behaves. If only I treasured my body less.

A couple months ago I went to a Wal-mart, which is currently expanding to become a Super Wal-mart. While there I saw an Excuse Our Mess sign and thought to myself, “Whatever it takes to get a Super Wal-mart!” Who could not be excited about that! I was grateful that this proprietor allowed me to shop at the store, regardless of the construction, instead of closing up shop and putting up barriers or paper over the windows. I’m sure it would be bad business for Wal-mart to do so, the store is crazy-busy whenever I go. Likewise, it would be absurd for me (or any believer) to hide in a closet; the Gospel needs to be proclaimed! How freeing it would be to have the same approach, to carry an Excuse My Mess sign as opposed to hiding behind a Coming Soon sign.

I’ve come to realize, and this has been truly hard for me to accept, perfection can not be achieved on Earth. Well, I take that back, perfection came and went through the birth, death, and resurrection of Christ. I will not taste perfection here. I wonder if my mind could even grasp what that would look like.

These are all new and fresh thoughts, I write with courageous words because I’m excited about learning more about this and I’m grateful for the formation that has already taken place.

Last year ended with a series of doctor appointments and personal research regarding a desire of mine and Jonathan’s to know why my body behaves as it does. What neurological disorder do I have? Is it progressive? Is it genetic? What can be done to relieve the jerking? Do I want a diagnosis? Its hard because I feel like nothing has changed, I need to be more patient. It’s been difficult for doctors to provide a diagnosis. We know that anxiety is a factor; But it’s not the only factor, my muscles contract come rain or shine, in peace or in stress. For now I’ve decided to focus on treating my anxiety, and one way I will do this is to seek professional counseling or behavioral therapy. The cards are still falling into place–this is a brief overview that I am sure I will provide better detail one day.

All this said, this year I hope to receive with joy the shabby tent God saved for me to occupy as I live my life out on earth. Coming soon: A fully redeemed bride and a beautiful body not just for me but for the church.

“For we know that when this earthly tent we live in is taken down (that is, when we die and leave this earthly body), we will have a house in heaven, an eternal body made for us by God himself and not by human hands.” 2 Corinthians 5:1 NLT

Pilgrims and Martha Stewart Aside, What is Thanksgiving?

Recently I went to google.com and typed “What is Thanksgiving?” In less than a quarter of a second the computer displayed over 23 million links! Evidently, there are many ways to describe Thanksgiving. Here is my take on it:

Where to begin?
I could start in 1621, when the first American Thanksgiving feast is recorded to have taken place and end with the many things that have grown out of America’s tradition of giving thanks each fourth Thursday in November -Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade, football rivalries, turkey trots, and Black Friday to name a few. But I think the best place to start is with the God of Isaac and Abraham because long before the first U.S. President, George Washington, issued the first national Thanksgiving Day Proclamation in 1789, David, a man after God’s own heart, wrote these words, “Let us come into his presence with thanksgiving; let us make a joyful noise to him with songs of praise! For the LORD is a great God, and a great King above all gods.”  (Ps. 95:2-3)

So what is Thanksgiving?
Thanksgiving is an opportunity for us to continue celebrating God’s abundant goodness. It’s not meant to be a burden (though we often turn it into one) but an excuse or – if I may be so bold – a reason to gather with family and friends, take a break from school and work, and remember and rejoice in God’s faithfulness. The day should not only beckon the question, what am I going to serve/eat/clean/do, but also – most importantly – for what am I thankful to God? Furthermore, our attitude of thankfulness should not depend on how much food and family surround us on Thanksgiving Day. David wrote the above words during a time in his life when food was not a commodity and many of his family and friends had turned on him.

How to prepare for Thanksgiving? (Aside from Martha Stewart’s advice)
I encourage you to think outside the box and give greater meaning to your Thanksgiving Day – for yourself and your family. This may look like reading scripture, praying, singing hymns, sharing, and serving. My fondest memories of Thanksgiving are from serving and sharing – serving my mother and sisters by helping them to cook and clean, serving the homeless by waking up early on my day off, driving downtown and passing out food, and sharing with my family specific reasons that I am thankful for them and for God. Furthermore, Thanksgiving Day is a great opportunity to prepare our hearts to celebrate the birth of our Lord. Thanksgiving is the pre-party to Christmas! All the things that we are thankful for on Thanksgiving spring from the gift of Jesus Christ.

While some of us don’t know the three essential ingredients for green bean casserole – green beans, cream of mushroom soup, and dried onions – and others, Americans included, didn’t know that pumpkin pie was probably not served at the first Thanksgiving meal, we all, no matter what country we come from, know Jesus Christ, and isn't He something to be thankful for! As Christians, we are called –invited, commissioned, entrusted –to give thanks to the Lord. We should not only give thanks on the fourth Thursday in November over a spread of turkey and stuffing, we should give thanks every day. We need to have a ThanksLIVING attitude!

[I wrote the above piece for the Trinity Wives Fellowship newsletter. Trinity Wives Fellowship is a great group of ladies whose husbands are attending seminary at TEDS (Trinity Evangelical Divinity School). Some of the wives are from America and many others are from all over the world. ]

On a personal note…
Each year Satan tries to mess up my Thanksgiving Day – maybe you can relate – I worry about preparing the food and coordinating the oven schedule and stress over strained relationships with a family and friends. This year, more than ever, my joy will be a target of Satan’s as I will celebrate Thanksgiving without family (thankfully, I have a husband to keep me company!!). Jonathan and I will be on-call at the shelter and therefore unable to leave the property. For the most part I have accepted this as an opportunity to invest in our marriage and family rather than as a sentence to do jail time. I’m eager to cook a Thanksgiving dinner on my own! We often joke that we’ve invited some of the good dogs from downstairs to join us for Thanksgiving dinner. But, I know that I must be careful with  my jokes and . I worry that in my attempt to distract my emotions with cooking and baking I may forget that Jesus will also be dining with us.  You see, we may be off from work and school on Thanksgiving day but Satan is definitely on duty – and yet, so is God!

If you are like me, prone to stressing and fussing on Thanksgiving Day, pick out a bible verse and tuck it in your apron pocket so that you are ready for battle. And remember that your battle is not with the turkey, the oven, your husband, or sister. I’ve selected Psalm 95:2-3 to memorize on Thanksgiving Day.

“Let us come into his presence with thanksgiving; let us make a joyful noise to him with songs of praise! For the LORD is a great God, and a great King above all gods.”  (Ps. 95:2-3)

More about Thanksgiving
This first Thanksgiving feast probably included: Lobster, rabbit, fish, squashes, beans, chestnuts, onions, leeks, honey, radishes, cabbage, and carrots

Today's traditional Thanksgiving feast would include: Turkey & gravy, stuffing, yams (sweet potatoes), green bean casserole (among other casseroles), mashed potatoes, cranberry sauce, and pumpkin pie.

Did you know that Thanksgiving Day is also observed in Canada, Liberia, The Netherlands & Norfolk Island?

For some devotionals & Bible verses on Thanksgiving go to http://www.christianity.com/thanksgiving/.

For videos & articles on the history of Thanksgiving go to http://www.history.com/topics/thanksgiving.

For Thanksgiving type recipes go to http://allrecipes.com/recipes/holidays-and-events/thanksgiving/

Why I don't like the B (busy) word

One of my least favorite words to describe myself is the word busy. Literally, my stomach turns whenever I use it. This has not always been the case but it is now. Some take pride or comfort in reporting to others that they are ‘busy’ while all I feel is guilt. There are many reasons why I am like this, but I think the most prominent and important reason (though not always the most prevalent reason) is due to a desire for God’s will to be done. Only with timid reserve could I reflect on how I am investing my time and concur that I’m making the best use of it with regards to God’s Kingdom. I agree that it is good to know our boundaries and responsibilities and follow through on our commitments. However, how can God use a person who has a flashing No Vacancy sign above their head to impact the world for him?

After being in a season of stillness, I am now in a season of business – another reason why the word busy has become recently burdensome. I clearly remember the quiet days during which I felt like everyone but me had somewhere to go and some reason to be. Today, a busy schedule comforts those insecurities. But should it? God loved me then and now. His purpose for me was, is, and will always be present. Just because my life got busier does not mean that it became more prevalent to God that I existed. My encouragement, whatever season you are in, don’t buy into the lie that your significance lies in your schedule or let your schedule dictate what you can or cannot do. The things God wants you to do will be things that you are able to do.

Ready or not, the holiday season is here and with it our life’s schedule will be – as Emeril would say – kicked up a notch. However, this is not an excuse to light up the No Vacancy sign or we will miss out on serving people like Joseph and Mary – you may remember that they were told on the night of our Savior’s birth that life in Bethlehem was too busy to make room for them. I’ve learned that our schedules may fluctuate between stillness and business but God is always the same. And just as God never changes, so does his desire for us to be his hands and feet – in ways that we know and in ways that we don’t know yet.

My encouragement,

give thanks to God for the things occupying your time,

reflect on where you are investing your time,

ask God what could be added or released from your schedule,

be ready for God to unexpectedly – to you, not to Him – rearrange your schedule.

I can do everything through him who gives me strength. Philippians 4:13

A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another. John 13:34-35

But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Matthew 6:33

She gave birth to her firstborn, a son. She wrapped him in cloths and placed him in a manger, because there was no room for them in the inn. Luke 2:7

A mustard-seed-mountain-moving faith

I was ¾ of the way through my training schedule when God said something that blew my mind away. Seriously. It challenged everything I knew – or thought I knew – about him.

I was crunching the numbers, calculating how many miles I could run, how many miles I needed to run, and how many days I had left to train. Trust me things were not looking good. I was behind on my training and it wasnt for lack of trying, which added even more stress. Then, as I drowned in distress, God gave me a modern, and very intimate, example of a mustard-seed-mountain-moving faith. Such a faith would look like this: A runner, forsaking their training schedule, yet stepping up to the starting line completely confident that the race is as good as won. No preparation needed, no hundred plus miles logged, just a complete and utter trust in God. (To drive this point home, for those that are not familiar with a half marathon training schedule, imagine anything you have strived to conquer, and then imagine being asked to forsake all preparation yet promised that you would still be a conqueror.) That image entered my mind and I began to cry. I cried in awe of Christ. I cried with a longing to have such a faith to move mountains beyond my justification. And, I cried for every man and women that is trying to earn their way to heaven’s finish line.

When it comes to being reconciled to God, Jesus is our training schedule. He is the way and the truth and the life. Only through Christ will we cross heaven’s finish line. Even more glorious and mind boggling, is the training schedule that Christ has outlined because it is not about us, what we can do or what we can train to do.

Yesterday I ran a half marathon. I spent months training for this run and still found it to be a huge challenge. After I signed up for the race (in March) I was pretty confident. I remember thinking, “I’ve got this in the bag! All I need to do is follow the training schedule.” And then my body failed me. There were days my legs were so weak that I had to grip the handle bars on the treadmill to sustain my body.  Frustrated, I realized that I was in over my head. The whole follow-the-training-schedule plan was not working. It took me weeks to recognize my arrogance. Yes, arrogance. (I know - I was confused too). God showed me that saying "I've got this" not only was not possible, it was not pleasing. What’s wrong with wanting to overcome an obstacle?  Doesn’t God want me to step outside my comforts and self-imposed limits?

God showed me that saying “I can” is just as arrogant as saying “I cannot”. I know – I bet you are confused too. So what can we say? How about this: He can! I can do all things through he who strengthens me means that whatever we strive for will be accomplished in result of our belief in Christ and not a hope vested in ourselves or others.

I crossed the finish line yesterday but it was not as imagined. Humbling would be the best word to describe it. My body failed me at about mile 10 with three miles between myself and the finish line. At about mile 11 a woman came and joined me. She ran beside me the rest of the way, bringing me water and encouragement. I would be wrong not to remember her in recalling my victory. She was definitely real. 

After I crossed the finish line a women said to me, "Well, maybe next time you will train better." Maybe I will - if there is a next time. Time will tell if yesterday's race was my inaugural and commemorative race. Whatever happens on earth, at least, I'm ready to cross heaven's finish line. And, my heart is more burdened for those that are not ready, for those who are at their 10th mile and need a savior.

Believing Jesus Christ is the Son of God, was crucified for our sin, and was accepted by God as a worthy sacrificial offering for our sin - that is the training schedule that will get you to heaven's finish line.

John 14:5-6
Thomas said to him, “Lord, we don’t know where you are going, so how can we know the way? Jesus answered, “I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.

Ephesians 2:8

For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith—and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God— not by works, so that no one can boast. 

Matthew 17:20

He replied, “Because you have so little faith. Truly I tell you, if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, ‘Move from here to there,’ and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you.”

Philippians 4:12-13

I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do everything through him who gives me strength.

Romans 8:37-39

No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.

How my purple toes are helping Africa

Dear family and friends, 

Did you know that I am running a half marathon? Its true! On September 11th I will run in the Chicago Half-Marathon. I’m running with a great team too – I’ll get that later.

First, I want to tell you about my purple toes. Yes you read right, my purple toes! I began training for the race in March; back then I was exhausted just thinking about running five miles! I wish I could say training has been a breeze. Honestly, training for this race has been one of the hardest things I have done.

My shoes have been my bread and butter. I can’t imagine training without them, granted they have caused me a lot of pain, sores, and blisters. For example, they turned the big toe on both my feet purple! At first I didn’t realize it because I had pink nail polish on my toes. Then I thought I had a toe fungus. Finally I realized my shoes were the culprit. They were too small – a full size and a half to be exact. Almost immediately I decided to buy new shoes. Now, I have a new pair and I’m ready for the race. I can’t imagine running the race with my old shoes. It’s amazing to think how quickly I took care of my need. It may have taken me weeks to figure out such a need existed, but once I did, once I removed my pink nail polish, I took care of it.

I bet you would have done the same thing, which is why I am writing you. I want to tell you about another need, one that is much more important than my shoes. One that cannot simply be covered up by pink nail polish. Education – in Angola, Africa to be exact. While primary education is free in Angola, many children are not able to attend school due to a lack of school buildings. (During the Angolan Civil War (1975-2002) nearly half of all schools were looted or destroyed). This is where Team Rise steps in – I’m taking part in the Team RISE 2011 to raise money for RISE International.

The mission of Rise International is to partner with Angolan churches, community leaders and government officials to build primary schools in rural Angola. The first school was built in 2003, just 8 years ago - and now there are over 100 schools built, and more than 60,000 children in school learning, those that would not have had the chance for years to come!

Each and every penny you give matters and will make a difference.  Our team goal for 2011 is to raise $200,000 by running the Chicago Half Marathon and full Marathon.  It takes on average $125 to create space in a school for a student, so this goal represents an additional 1,600 students that will be able to go to school because of you. 

Would you consider giving $13 to Rise International? It’s an odd number – 13 – but also significant. Why?

…13 is the number of miles I’ll run on September 11th

…13 (dollars) is about how much you’d spend eating out…how about eating in for a change, to make a change? J

…13 (years) is the average length of time an American child – and hopefully an Angolan child, thanks to your gift – is afforded to spend in grade school

Click here to make a donation to Team Rise now. All donations are secure and sent directly to RISE International by FirstGiving, who will email you a printable record of your donation.

I’m so glad I got a chance to share with you about my race and Rise International.

Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!

Emily 

PS...I usually don't post stuff like this on my blog but thought you may enjoy knowing about a way the Lord is growing my faith muscles in a very concrete and physical way. Plus, I couldn't pass on the opportunity to tell you about the needs in Angola. I hope you will consider helping these kiddos out!

Why Spring Needs Winter

I’ve thought for some time what I would post today. Where could I begin to describe the last year of my life. A year ago today I said goodbye to Texas, something I had never done. After a loong road trip we arrived in Deerfield and finally saw our new home. You’d be surprised how many people ask Jon and me, “Why did you come all the way up here?”  Well, in case you forgot, we came up here asking for a challenge. And boy did God deliver!

There have been joys, triumphs, falls, and challenges this past year. Joys – having only my husband to cling to, especially on cold nights. Triumphs – finding a job at Trinity and gaining the benefit of tuition reimbursement for me and my man. Falls – Yelling “I hate it here” in response to the cold. Challenges – accepting that home is Deerfield and not San Antonio.

This past year my love for family, friends, and Texas was strengthened in new and inexperienced ways. And, in case there was ever a doubt (which sometimes there was) I firmly know now that I am deeply loved by my family and friends. Whoever said, “when the going gets tough, the tough get going” was right. I’ve been amazed and blessed by the family and friends who, despite the distance, have continued to pursue and support us.

Illinois and I continue to have a love-hate relationship, but I do believe love is winning right now. And, I pray that it will continue like that through winter.  

A couple weeks ago I heard a message preached by a friend of my fathers. Although the message was in Spanish (a language I hardly know) God used it to pierce my heart through and through. The message covered a very familiar part of scripture and an overlooked part in scripture, Jeremiah 29: 4-14. Maybe you are like me and like to focus of the later part of that scripture.

In response to the message and recalling last year’s journey, I wrote the below poem. While I have your attention, I’d like to dedicate this poem to my sister, Joanna, who is also learning the ropes of a new place. I’m praying for you!

Brought here by God

As a father carries his sleeping child

So I carried you here

I cradled you in my arms

Knowing your fragile form

You must trust that I brought you here

That it was I and no one else

Doing so will help you stand firm

When Winter’s wind pushes against your back

Spring flowers only bloom

After Winter’s harsh winds

And as Spring needs Winter

So you need this season

Growth comes through winds of change

Allow me to take responsibility

Allow me to show you why

But you will never fully recognize Spring’s beauty

While holding onto the past

Yes, it feels as though you have been exiled

But do not forget – you are my child

And I am your merciful father

You must anticipate your restoration

Again and again

Remind me of my promise to you:

For I know the plans I have for you

Plans to prosper you and not to harm you

Then I will remind you:

Seek the peace and prosperity of the city to which

I have carried you into exile.

Therefore, build your home in this new place

And devote yourself to your new community

And when it is time, I will carry you away

Wait patiently, Spring will come

Jeremiah 29:4-14

New International Version (NIV)

 ⁴ This is what the LORD Almighty, the God of Israel, says to all those I carried into exile from Jerusalem to Babylon: ⁵ “Build houses and settle down; plant gardens and eat what they produce. ⁶ Marry and have sons and daughters; find wives for your sons and give your daughters in marriage, so that they too may have sons and daughters. Increase in number there; do not decrease. ⁷ Also, seek the peace and prosperity of the city to which I have carried you into exile. Pray to the LORD for it, because if it prospers, you too will prosper.” ⁸ Yes, this is what the LORD Almighty, the God of Israel, says: “Do not let the prophets and diviners among you deceive you. Do not listen to the dreams you encourage them to have. ⁹ They are prophesying lies to you in my name. I have not sent them,” declares the LORD.

 ¹⁰ This is what the LORD says: “When seventy years are completed for Babylon, I will come to you and fulfill my good promise to bring you back to this place. ¹¹ For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. ¹² Then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. ¹³ You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart. ¹⁴ I will be found by you,” declares the LORD, “and will bring you back from captivity.^[a] I will gather you from all the nations and places where I have banished you,” declares the LORD, “and will bring you back to the place from which I carried you into exile.”